2010! New year new beginnings

alright! it's a new year! hmm...before i touch on the future, perhaps a little retrospection would be good...

2009 was a really busy year and a lot of great things happened but overall it wasn't that fantastic. had lots of great times with my colleagues from starhub as well as the trip to australia with my primary school clique. not to mention my 21st birthday which many of my wonderful friends made really memorable just by turning up (even those who turned up late. i really appreciate the effort). 2009 also marked the biginning of my uni life. but what really marred the year were the continuous setbacks. things have been pretty rough this year. tough situations and tough people just keep coming. even right now i'm still being plagued by these haunting circumstances.

some people are born exuding an aura of annoyance but the thing is they don't realize it. unfortunately for me i just have to tolerate their lack of EQ. but my tolerance is reaching it's limits soon. also, apparently continuous effort and earnestness isn't really appreciated around these parts of the world. trust me, the number 1 lesson i've learnt from 2009 is never to expect an outcome proportionate to the effort you put in. whoever has been telling you otherwise has been lying through their teeth.

ok, never mind. let's forget about the unhappy past. what's most important is we learn from experience and become wiser.

what's a new year without new year resolutions right? my new year resolution is....to become braver. i've been told that it's quite an unusual new year resolution. it may sound simple but bravery covers many different aspects.

1. to dare to stand up to unreasonable (and irritating) people
2. to dare to fight for my own rights and make my own stand
3. to dare to be less dependent
4. to dare to try new things and get new experiences
5. to dare to beat the system

these are just a few examples but it really covers a very wide range of aspects. i feel like somehow in the past year i've let myself revolve around the situations and circumstances that have been happening. it's time for change. i'm going to take back control of my life. i should be at the centre and the rest should revolve around me. time to take a step foward. those people who have been taking me for granted should just look out. you've had your chance with the docile side of me. there's only so much bull i can take so i'm going to be hitting back. and i'll be hitting back hard.

at this juncture i find that it may be appropriate to address this to whomever it may concern (i'll relay the message personally anyway): i'm quiting hall cheerleading! i gave it a shot but i really find it to be unsuitable for me. first, the scheduling is always last minute and random. not to mention the lack of meal times. (the timings are just plain bad) and about trainings in the day time, most people have other commitments that they would actually have higher priority like training for sports. and the person who's supposed to take charge isn't even serious about this. c'mon if you want us to turn up, you got to turn up. you are obligated to do so. also, we don't even have a first aid kit nearby. cheerleading is a high risk activity. any injury i've sustained in a single training session has been more serious than all my softball and hockey trainings combined. and it leaves me so battered i can't even go to the gym! my neck is still injured such that it hurts when i turn my head. enough is enough. i'm not willing to put my health at stake for nothing. seriously there's little incentive (if any) for me to continue. i quit.

that's just the first step to the new me. so whoever else it is, watch out because i'm going to get in your face if you keep it up and take me for granted.

maybe i'm getting a little angsty but this whirlwind of involuntary activities has really been disrupting my gym sessions. it doesn't help that the gym closes early on holiday eves and public holidays (like today). it has been ultra annoying these 2 weeks because of this. well, it's not necessarily a bad thing. at least i've managed to get my thoughts sorted out and i'm liking my shiny new attitude. tougher and better. so to all you muthaf**kers out there, stop wasting my time.

to end this off, i'll leave you guys with my song of the moment. enjoy!